Sunday, March 28, 2010

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Hibatchi Hell

Once upon a time there was a flier that boasted discounted rates on a fun evening watching cooks fry up eggs making fried rice from scratch, flipping spatulas and wacky songs. Hibachi fun at it's finest. The King & Queen thought it would be a fantastic idea to bring the Princess to experience the fun.  She loved it at 6 months, why not at two and a half?

Upon arriving, the Royal Pain in the Ass Family was sat with two other girls who spent their evening texting and didn't so much as crack a smile. Waitresses flocked and doted over the Princess while the she colored in her Hello Kitty coloring book or as the Princess affectionately called it "Big Cat." All was going picture perfect until ... the show began.

Fire + Princess = Hysterics.

The King & Queen removed the situation from the situation, with a lot of laps around the block until the fire has ceased. You'd think there would be some level of relaxation. You'd think wrong.

After consistent freak out, and taking turns eating dinner, they got it all wrapped up.  You know what is weird? Eating at a hibachi table, alone.  While the Queen & Princess did laps the King enjoyed catching pieces of chicken in his mouth.

On their walk back to the chariot the Royal PIA Family realized one very important fact.  They forgot about their coupons and were carrying home the most expensive take out meal in the whole wide kingdom.  All the could be done is interview the Princess.

Friday, March 26, 2010

My Demanding Fish



While all I wanted to do was get her swimming about all she wanted to do was boss me around... that's her saying "Get in get in get in."

This video will be apart of her Olympic flashback piece, Summer Olympics 2024.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Like Mother like Daughter



Reason number 48957 I love LARGE glasses - when you are stuck wearing glasses and the sun is bright, you can still rock the shades. Can you see there are TWO sets of glasses on my pretty little head?

Reason number 48958 they look good on everyone, including my offspring.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Insult to Injury

Not only do I have to drop drops every hour... but I just got my Rx filled.... notice how SMALL the bottle is. Bottle 1 was kicked by 1pm. And now onto bottle two... and notice it isn't even FILLED to the line. 
25 bucks a pop. 



FML. 




One Eyed Willy in the HizHouse


Last night - I thought I was being punished for putting mascara on. The price of beauty. My right eye got seriously irritated. I thought a fleck of mascara got in my eye or something. It wasn't horrible last night, but it wasn't comfortable.  This morning, at o'dark thirty I awoke in pretty bad shape. I was convinced I had pink eye (my mortal enemy). Luckily I called a doctor- who has an office across the street from me. I didn't know that when I called but was pleasantly surprised to find out as the nurse gave me directions that she was describing my neighborhood.  Things were "looking" up. Unluckily, I apparently have a pretty serious eye issue. It really isn't comforting when the doctor repeats, several times "Not Good. Not good. This is very serious."

Long and short: I have a corneal ulcer - which apparently is not good and very serious. All joking aside (as much as I possibly can) I'm one eye willed today - putting a drop in my eye every 15 minutes. For 2 hours. Then every hour. Then a follow up tomorrow morning 7am. NOT across the street.  Of course she is in her other office 30 min away tomorrow.
Wondering if I can catch a break. Just curious. 

Seriously. 
-1 eyed willy. 

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

I Surrender


I never quite addressed what happened to my car during my chapters of information about the Meeting that Never Was.  Apparently there is a coil that was busted and most of the parts (spark plugs etc) the original ones so all those needed to be replaced -  I guess the tune ups would have been helpful.  Car fiasco one ran me about 700.  Which if I'm being completely honest, since it's the first time I've had to pay for something to be fixed, for the most part, I'm thinking that's not too bad.

Until my car broke. Again.

I broke the lock this time. It was Friday afternoon and I took the late afternoon for some much needed quiet time.  I went to the movies, one of my favorite things to do alone, and skipped to my car. Happiness. 

I unlocked the door, heard something click... but kept smiling. 

That's when it started and the smiling, just for a moment, stopped. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. 

Whatever I clicked is something in the door lock and now my car alarm is on constantly. 

Friday I drove that sucker right into my garage, shut the door, and hoped for the best that either the battery would die or it would stop after awhile and it did. Monday,  I had to drive it to the shop. The whole way - BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.  

I pulled up. Gave the guy my keys- he asked what was wrong. Keep in mind, I'm the only person in the lot, in the shop and if you missed it - my car is still beeping. I look at the car- look at him. Look at the car. Look at him. 

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.  

I tell him my alarm is broken, he says, "What do you mean broken?"

Again. 

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP. 

Seriously. 

I say, "Well... is it supposed to do that uncontrollably? OR shouldn't I be able to turn it off?"

He says, "I guess turn it off."

He guesses. This is what I am dealing with. Here's to hoping they call me today to tell me it's all set and gosh golly - it's on the house!

Monday, March 15, 2010

com·mit·ted : The Calm

And here you thought the story was over. No not so, silly rabbit, I just haven't posted the conclusion. If a post is never published did it never happen? Alas. That isn't the case. Play catch up, if you will.
 
Chapter 5: The Calm

In the morning we met and began to review the plan ahead of us. As much as we were discussing the new and delayed agenda doubt began to sneak in as the snow outside continued to come down and reports continued to come in
of delayed or canceling attendance. The long (and chapter 5) and short of it is - we canceled the meeting. Every one's safety was of the utmost importance and to really get what we wanted out of the meeting we needed everyone there. There we were. There I was, 15 hours deep into commute, only a few hours of sleep to my name and all of that to be stranded in Neuvo Jersey.

I laughed. Uncontrollable, 5150 laughing. There it was again.

When you get handed a snowmageddon, you make snowmen. While the Boston crew high tailed it out of there - I may or may not have squealed "NOOO NO ONE IS LEAVING UNTIL I GET TO!" After I got over the loss of freedom I realized there was fun to be had. And had it I did.

But wait... there's more - like every experience like this has to have? A celebration of survival. Girls just want to have fun, style. And in the end? In the very end...


*disclaimer: when I say "best" I really mean ... it could be worse.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

sunday snaps

  1. Sleeping late rocks my world.  My dear husband let this lazy bum sleep until after 9-10am on the regular. 
  2. My baby daddy. After sleeping late  with no coffee in sight, I was greeted with not only a coffee but a few hours of quiet time. L got a trip to the gym & pool with Daddy and I got some me time. Glorious. 
  3. Movie night has commenced.  Both Saturday & Sunday night we dimmed the lights, snugged up on the couch and watched movies.  L gasped from time to time asking, "Wha happens?" It's too cute. 
  4. Lying.  Not pleased she is starting her con early... but when caught it takes all I have in me not to laugh. C, "L are you lyin'?" L, "Rooaarrr!!!!
  5. New blogger layout. Horray for choices. I awoke on Saturday (late as explained) with alone time on my side and a new format to play with. Now if I could just get it all right.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

No Seriously, BREATHE

In the darker moments sometimes I'd go from Keep Breathing... calmly ... to a more serious plea to my baby girl.



Breathe in breathe out, tell me all of your doubt
Everybody bleeds this way, just the same
Breathe in breathe out, move on and break down
If everyone goes away, I will stay

We push and pull and I fall down sometimes
I'm not letting go, you hold the other line
'Cause there is a light in your eyes, in your eyes

Hold on hold tight if I'm out of your sight
And everything keeps moving on, moving on
Hold on hold tight make it through another night
Everyday there comes a song with the dawn

We push and we pull and I fall down sometimes
I'm not letting go, you hold the other line
'Cause there is a light in your eyes, in your eyes
'Cause there is a light in your eyes, in your eyes

Breathe in and breathe out
Breathe in and breathe out
Breathe in and breathe out
Breathe in and breathe out

Look left look right
To the moon in the night
Everything under the stars is in your arms

There is a light in your eyes, in your eyes
There is a light in your eyes, in your eyes
There is a light in your eyes, in your eyes
There is a light in your eyes, in your eyes

Friday, March 12, 2010

Baby's First SCHOOL Photo


Holy mother of what. My baby is not a baby. I've been told, time and time again, not to call her "the baby." Sierra tells me weekly, but I don't listen. Home girl has 4 offspring... all babies if you ask me, why don't I listen to her? My thought is she's the baby, or maybe not.

Then there was this....


Tuesday, March 2, 2010

com·mit·ted : Through the Other Side

Chapter 4: Through the Other Side

3:00 pm: 3+ hours of sitting in wait, while stuffing my face, wrapped up in the fetal position, doing what work I can with the soothing sounds of the epic The Real Housewives of New York play in the background. I awaited for Don's call but to no avail. Who makes a girl wait? So I called him. Truth be told, I'm not 100% of exactly what he said but the jest of it was: the car won't be ready until tomorrow (Friday - yes people at this point - 4 chapters deep we are still in day one). And not only tomorrow, but the end of the day - no dice. Not an option. I have a meeting to attend.

On the road again...

GPS thanks be, says it's less than 2 hours away. At least it wasn't 2+ hours away....

7:00 pm: For those of us in the house where math isn't our friend... we're pushing 3 hours at this point. There is snow, rain, sleet, sunshine and then soon after - darkness. I used my GPS to get me to my final FINAL destination. Unfortunately and obviously only they way my luck can deliver, the address on the website was:

100 College Road East

Go ahead... put that address in google maps. Go ahead. See what happens. Go ahead.

That's right if you did it - you'll see... it'll bring you right to where I found myself after 7pm that fine night. In the back end of Princeton University. It's lovely this time of year.

100 College Road W

Not lovely? Trying to get out of there. That right there is a clear road block, right where my trusty GPS said I needed to go.
By the time I got to my final destination, while I was originally going to just go to bed how could I when drinks and food were awaiting me?

15 total times in route... and it was time to let loose. Including my hair which had been pinned up since 4am this morning.

(that is indeed my beer AND wine - car parked at hotel and ready to be taxied around!)

Final mishap? Because you know there is one... upon getting back to our hotel room we may or may not have needed to open a bottle of wine. That bottle... it may have given us a little more trouble than we bargained for - or frankly that I felt at that point I was really due at this point of the day.

OH. No that's not the end of the story... not quite yet.

Monday, March 1, 2010

com·mit·ted : The Eye of the Storm

Chapter 3: The Eye of the Storm

8:04 am: As I near the George W Bridge on the road to from New York to New Jersey, talking about how my drive is (not) moving along I begin to put put putter. While I am on the right side of the road, but not quite the shoulder and trying to explain it is going to take longer than I expected to get to the meeting - that time line immediately extended.

With a car stalled out 3.2 miles from GW bridge, blocking traffic breathing slowly after screaming "F a duck" or another favorite "Mother F'er" in the ear of my poor unsuspecting phone a friend. Her response? "Do you want me to look something up for you, on the Internet?" While I appreciated the thought and offer to help I had all that covered - what I needed now? A way out and off to Jerse.

I called AAA, however inconvenient, and awaiting help. As I waited, so close to the side of the road, yet so far - I was warmly received with honks, middle fingers and the love that only New York can show. Two guys pulled over and while I thought there was nothing they could do to help, how I was wrong. As usual. These two angels came over and helped me steer (backwards) down the slight incline I was on, onto the shoulder. Ah and finally the silence set in - no more cussing, fingers flying or honking as I await for the tow truck. Tow truck #1 that is.

Oh yeah, that's right because of the road I was on, AAA couldn't send a truck. What they could do is let a company who could pick me, pick me up - tow truck #1 and when I get towed off the exit, call again and get into tow truck #2. Honestly. While I waited for the first pick up, C found a place to bring my car. If any luck my piece O junk could be fixed at my final destination where the guy there has a level 3 English. Sure we didn't know what he said, mostly, but the hope was you didn't need to speak English well to fix a dang car. He told C he would 'call me' (we think) and he never did. At this point, I'm thinking there was a misunderstanding, miscommunication perhaps I didn't give him enough time. I'm hopeful his optimism will be contagious and not his business etiquette of returning phone calls.

9:40 am: Tow truck #1 dropped me off in the BoogieDown Bronx, with a special little surprise. He decided to "shake" my car before dropping it. Apparently, that did the trick and before demanding a tip, the tow truck driver #1 informed me that the car started. Of course it did, and unfortunately this has happened before.

I called AAA again, as instructed and was told to "Sit tight" (where would I go) and the next tow truck would be by to get me on or before 11 am (I repeat, it's 9:40 am at this point). He dropped me off, right in front of a D&D. Where my morning really began, but was so not soon to end. At this point in my journey, despite my recent pit stop, I got worried. I needed to use the ladies room, but didn't want to leave my car on the side of the road in the BoogieDown. And then it hit me, oh yeah - it's broken down. Where would anyone take it? Event though the car started, I could tell there wasn't a whole lot of power left in her, and so what if it got stolen?

10:40 am Tow truck #2 arrives, and oh boy was that fun. First the truck itself stalled as he was loading up my stalled car. While I sat on the side of the road awaiting the next leg of my journey I just laughed. I laughed so hard I'm fairly certain the driver was going to call the police reporting a 5150. Despite that scare, he really wanted to push the envelope.

Tow truck driver: "Your car is pretty strapped in there."
Me: "I hope so."
Him: "We don't want to get there with out the car."
Me: "No. No we don't. But frankly I wouldn't be surprised."

It's at this point he proceeds to tell a story about how once he got to his destination with out the car he was towing.

This is not a drill. I am not making this up.


We arrived to the car's final destination (not mine) and while I couldn't figure it what in the hell the guy was telling me - what I could figure out is my mom would pick me up at the wine store a few doors down. He said he would call me. I started walking to go get some vino, up a hill - and slipped down it of course because that's how I roll and who would really be surprised?

12:01 pm: Arrive at Nana Lu's. It's at this point I am in the eye of the storm. Through the madness and at a calming - the thing with the eye of the storm? It's just the beginning of the end and there is more to come.
(c) 2007 all rights reserved. aka don't be a D and swipe any content, photos, etc - sucka. Should you be tempted, let me know so I can be flattered and then give me something write about.