C kept talking about this "cluster feeding" where she just mows for a few hours at a time, of course conveniently during the middle of the night. I thought he was full of it, until last night when I was back on shift. Sure enough between the wee hours of 12-7am she would eat like a moose, nod off for an hour and wake up with the munchies. I'm fairly certain if she were to be bfeeding she wouldn't be able to get this kind of satisfaction, I mean I'm only one woman and she kind of cleaned out the fridge with the reserves. Cluster feeding = baggy eyes, among other things.
After Thursday, the last few days have been good. She gets fussy when she's hungry and with the morphine getting lower and lower, baby's getting her appetite back. Let's face it- she's a big girl and she can eat. The drug has been suppressing her desire to eat and now that that is coming down more and more she wants food, and she wants it yesterday.
The plan remains the same, she is coming down by .06 everyday. Today, at 4 pm if she continues to be doing well as she has been doing, she'll be down to .12 and that is as low as she has ever been. Mayday Thursday she was at .15, so today is a big day. At a certain point the dose is so teeny tiny they will just stop giving it, I'm afraid to ask when that is- but I'd put money on tomorrow. The doctors and nurses say she is almost there. I'm not officially packed up yet- but we very well may be home by the end of the week. I informed the nurse last night, I don't want to hear about a day that we might go- just let everyone know I just need 15 minutes and we can be out of their hair. I'd rather not get get my hopes up anymore, so a little warning before we have to leave would be just fine. If we do get to take her home this week, it will be in time for her 1 month birthday! We talked about it last night, going through the last few weeks, it seems like a lifetime already. Can you believe it's been over 3 weeks? Wait until you hear about how she even came to be- the days preceding her birthday were a CF in their own right.
Keep on hoping and praying that this is the week, it very well may be.