Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Why I hate moving. Part II

Week of September 19th – Move IN week

The after week one, there was another week of hell moving. Let's just start with day one, shall we? 

  1. Ohio has readily available Dunkin Donuts. The Target I had put in the GPS I drove to doesn't exist. It started out, Ohio - 1, me - 1
  2. Despite me asking "do the tvs need to be here" & getting the "no prob" the AT&T U-verse guy came to install, and cannot. Ohio - 2, me - 1
  3. Then, when I thought the day couldn't get any worse (see no Internet until our TV arrived, and not TVs, because if you recall - that's in the overflow truck and who knew when that would come (see foreshadowing): a rabid deer almost successfully committed suicide using my car her weapon of choice. Ohio - 3, me - 1. Since not successful maybe me - 2?

    Now, that was Monday, what did the rest of the week look like? 

  1. It was lovely that we had movers - but it's like when you are public speaking & you don't know what to do with your hands. There's nothing I can do until they were done. I couldn't sit on the couch, that seemed weird, so I've literally walked around in circles all day.

  2. When I wasn't walking around in circles, I stuck my foot in my mouth. Like when I accidentally commented on how hot it is. While a mover was balancing 3 boxes on his back & I carried a coffee & my phone.

  3. Now, remember, my week started with no Internet. Since the Internet couldn’t be set up, I spent my week driving back and forth to Starbucks to fulfill some work obligations. One night, until 10 pm.  Let's just say, the people of the 'bucks  really had my well being in their hands. They SAY they gave me decaf.... but really? Who is to say?

    Side note: when I wasn't at Starbucks, where I saw shady ass deals going on - who knew that loan sharks did business over a venti latte machio-whats they call it? I was at Panera. One afternoon, while wa
    iting to get on a conference call, my "friendly" neighbor dropped F bombs like it was his J O B or he wanted me to lose mine. Luckily he left right before I needed to be unmuted.

  4. I ended up needing to take the remainder of the work week off, due to not having internet. Lucky to have the ability to do so? Absolutely? Irritated that I have to? Ab.so.freaking.lutely. 
  5. Note to self/ just because you see an old crusty dryer, one shouldn't assume you can slide your new one in. Gas vs. electric apparently it's a big difference. Who knew?

  6. And then, and then, this happened.  This really is the pièce de résistance. It even beat the flat tire on the brand new car as we were leaving the home we love: They.lost.our.TRUCK.

    Commentary: Are you freaking kidding me? I'll see your lost luggage and raise you a lost moving truck of "overflow." WHO does that EVEN happen to?

  7. What's worse than a stinky diaper? One packed away & discovered days later.

  8. And yes, while it took 24 hours to realize it: we realized we didn't have hot water. We had to watch a YouTube video, cause we’ve never done this before. It’s how we do.

  9. I was a hott mess for days, beyond the day I didn't know we didn't have hot water. One afternoon, as I walked into Walmart it occurs to me- if I showed up on the People of Walmart site I would t be shocked.

  10. And then, the day Internet installation was happening (a week. it was painful), so was Kindergarten registration. To say I was emotional?  Understatement. Then, and of course, the Internet installation guy took so long it ran up against my appointment to register.  He was blocking me. Fist in the air.

    Commentary: You might say, just have him move his car. Nothing, if you haven't noticed is that easy because, you see, we live ON a highway so coming in or out of the driveway is a shit show. Fine, it's not a highway, but it's close. 

  11. Then there was the time I had to return to Home Depot (not close) to exchange the keys they had made for me -  because of course, they didn't work.

  12. Good news? I had to go back to Home Depot anyway, so it wasn't an extra trip to get food for our guests. Bad news? The guests were a colony of ants times a million.

  13. Then, days later I remember I left my beloved necklace at the hotel we were just at.

    Commentary: it's just recently (5 weeks in the Cleve) that I finally got the official word that it's lost/gone/stolen/thrown out. SAD.

  14. Annnnnd then, our Internet went down (& Tv/phone).... Until a technician can come out. That's as short lived as it comes. We then spent DAYS with and without Internet. Wasn't it adorable when the original installation man said a wireless connection to my work computer would have no issues? God.damn.liar.

    Commentary: And then to add to my AT&T U-verse hatred? Apparently you have to pay for a private phone number. Since that's crazy, I didn't sign up to pay for yet another thing (like Internet/cable/phone that don't work), I started to get 8-10 solicitation calls. A day. Good news? The calls meant the phone / Internet / cable was working. Bad news? solicitation calls? For the rest of the day I wasn't battling error messages. It.Was.NOT.Awesome. I did the math: I had
    been a customer for 3 days and issues with service for 1 week.

  15. We came to this house without a refrigerator. Cause the thing we needed most was to go up and down to the basement every time we needed the fridge. Do you have any idea how often you need to get to the fridge with two kids?

  16. If I told you that the water line they installed when they did finally deliver our fridge bust & won't shut off. Would you believe me?

    Commentary: Water.everywhere.

  17. I've told my husband every day to be careful in the driveway. Every day he tells me to relax. Within one week he swiped the side of my car into the wall.

    Related: based on my yelling pretty sure my neighbors think I'm crazy. Can't say I blame them. 

And that's it. That's the "short" story of our long journey to the Cleve. Crazy town? Yes. Will likely be repeated in 1-3 years? Absolutely. Will I survive it? Most likely, no.

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