Saturday, January 29, 2011

Baby Talk

When we started thinking about having another baby we started talking to L about it. Her requests were clear. At first a stern and clear, "No, thanks you." At least she said thank you? Manners are important.  We got her to come around to the idea of sharing the spotlight.  She insisted, "Just a baby sister." L tried to negotiate through it. She would say, "how about you have a baby brother and I'll take the baby sister?" Since we were successful the first time around, we just kept on her until she broke until we got through; we can't choose which parts the baby comes with. Now she excited to welcome her baby brother OR baby sister. She has, however, checked a few times how many babies will come. On the way into school the other day she checked in with her Daddy, "There is just one baby, right? Cause I only want just one baby. Right? Just one. Daddy???"

Before we ironed out her special requests, she wanted to know when her baby would be coming. The discussion when a little like this.
L: "Will my baby be here tomorrow?"
Me: "I wish!! No, the baby will come in the summer. We have to wait."
L: "OH, at the beach?"

A few days later I asked her what she wanted to do, it was a lazy day Sunday and I wanted to see what she wanted to do.
L: "Oh, let's go to the beach and get my baby."
Me: "If only it was that easy girl." 

OK, I didn't say that but I wanted to.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Belly Tales

Mama: "The baby's in my belly."
L: "NO. A baby in your belly?"
Mama: "Yup. You were in my belly when you were a baby, too."
Daddy: "It's true."
L: "No. Way. That's silly." (giggling)
Mama: "I'll show you. I have pictures."

Picture proof provided...

(side note - I am NOT looking forward the all that)

L: (mind explodes)
Daddy: "Whan I was a baby, I was in Grammy's belly."
Mama: "When I was a baby, I was in Nana Lu's belly. And when YOU were a baby - you were in my belly first. See that's you in there!"
L: "Wait. Who is in MY belly?" (grabbing her stomach: slightly horrified, slightly confused, slightly excited)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Real Reality TV

Where last we left our irresponsible adult Superhero, she took a test a passed with flying lines.

Like déjà vu, I was shocked. I remember feeling just as shocked the first time around, this time more so... how LONG had I BEEN preggers? I've heard of that show "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant" and refused to watch due to unbelievability. I mean, I am obsessed with vampires, and I find that scenario to be more believable.

OK so now I sit, stand, whatever- black out in disbelief and await the ball & chain to get back from the gym. Longest hour, ever.

Me: "I have good news and bad news. What do you want first?"
Him: "Good news?"
Me: "I'm pregnant."
Him: "WHAAAAAT??????"
Me: "Yup. Bad news? I've been knocked up... for awhile, I think."
Him: "WHAAAAAT??????"
Me: "Yup. I just talked to a nurse... and loose calculations put me at 10 weeks. 10. Weeks." 
Him: "WHAAAAAT??????"

Following quotes, not in any particular order:
Him: "OH MY GOD. I GAVE YOU THERAFLU LAST NIGHT!" (totally disregarding all the holiday time drinking. Yup, TheraFlu is what we should really be worried about.)
Him: "OH this means we can do the whole beach house with Liza and Co." (We wanted to rent a beach house with friends over the summer, thinking we might have missed the boat.)
Him: "I knew it."

The "I knew it" quote almost threw me in an hysterical tizzy... if you KNEW it why didn't you SHARE this important information with me? How did he know? You don't want to know... but I'm going to tell you anyway... at another time.   In fact, there is more to this fun "discovery" story. I'm going to stop here though and let it all sink in.

This is happening. I am very much knocked up. Not (quite) 10 weeks, but I'm though my first trimester by the time you read this if all goes well and as planned.

You know what I haven't stopped saying? Bananas.

This shit is bananas.*

*Yes, the shit is bananas, crazy. Wild. This is also a pop culture reference. Gwen Stefani sang a song, Hollaback Girl. Best line includes this shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

Fast forward - trip to a laboratory to take a blood test. This time, was different, as I had previously been doing some research of local OB/GYN groups.  I called one of the referrals I received and they were able to take some blood pretty immediately. As I walked in all the non-fun memories of things like blood work came rushing back.

Blood technician: "This will only take a minute."Me: "I forgot how much I hate this."
Blood technician: "I know. I understand, when I'm on your side, I hate it."
Me: "No. You don't understand. I hate this, it's in my blood."

Some things don't change; being knocked up, makes me a cheesy. My jokes become chessy delicious. I waited for the results, officially, but knew what they'd come back with. The next morning I called in and talked to the same woman who nicely helped me the day before, navigating through the tears (surprise not sadness), excitement, "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant" references the whole kit and caboodle.

Lady who had to listen to me blubber: "Yup. I have your test results right here. Yup. You are really pregnant."
Me: "Hahaha. OK, so when can I be seen?
Lady who had to listen to me blubber: "How early can you get in?"
Me: "I think I'm only 10 minutes away."

I was seen later on that afternoon. And we got to see... sticks don't lie.


9.5 weeks, not 10. Due 8.5.2011. Bizzaro. World.

Last time I was knocked up I started thinking about going into the t-shirt business.  This time I think it's a matter of health and well being for babies in route everywhere.
At the time of this point, the 26th marks 4 years ago that we found out we'd be parents for the first time. Wowza. Parents to be again, why do I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone?

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


This is going to be a draft and I will publish when it's appropriate to. Why? Let's paint the picture.

Today is 1.5.2011. I am talking to you from the past. Isn't this freaky? 

On Monday the 3rd I started getting sick. I got the chills, I was coughing. I(t) was ugly. I have NEVER felt like this. I left work (though I work from home... so it's more like I walked away from my computer with out looking back at around 5:15pm) sending the following message to my manager. 

Hi. I'm really dying. Tell everyone I said goodbye.I loved working with everyone. It's been great. But my time has come. The grim reaper is here and I can no longer withstand the urge to go w/him. I am seeking peace.

God bless her sense of humor and/or her ability to "get" mine.

That night I did what I could. I took TheraFlu and went to bed early. By 11:30 I was up and the ball & chain (well meaning) got up to get me a Sudafed PM. I'm fairly sure he handed me speed, because all it did was wake me up even more. I headed out to the couch because I felt awful to keep him up as I coughed with every muscle in my body... muscles I didn't even know I had. 

At approximately 3 am, still awake, still miserable I emailed a few of my co-workers I work with and my manager a T.O.D. (time of death) email - calling it for the next day. Anyone who knows me knows this is bananas. I don't call in sick. First of all, I barely take vacation days (not something I am proud of, just a fact). Sick days? No way. I think in the 8 years I have been with this company, I have been sick 2 or 3 times? At most. And usually it's because I'm contagious. I work from home... so the fact I couldn't walk 2 doors down to work, was serious business.  

Somewhere between sending the email and 4 am, I felt a flutter in my stomach.  Not like I was going to throw up, more like an alien invasion sort of situation. 

At 4 am wanting to leave a note for the ball & chain, letting him know what the potential cause of my death might be. You know, so he can point the ME in the right direction.  I watch too many crime shows.  I went on WebMD.  Yes, they have an app for that. I put in my symptoms - you know the usual as far as WebMD goes (why does anyone use this app? Must be why it's free). I could have had a variety of conditions including but not limited to: bronchitis, liver disease, cancer, common cold, pregnancy. You know, the usual. 

The ball&chain and I have talked about the whole second addition fairly regularly. Trying to be (somewhat) responsible, we planned post-wedding of a great friend of ours. That was the plan.  Our first time at the rodeo, we were very much blessed with being on point when it came to reproduction. We aren't good at many things but fertilization and eggs? We got that.  We talked about it, let it ride 10 months later - maybe you heard? It's a girl. 

This time around, we started trying in November - but there were specific signs that pointed to the clear and absolute sign of the first time around being beginners luck. 

First and foremost (and maybe the following should count for reasons 1 - 5) other than being sick this week... I feel great, fine. I do not feel like I'm going to die. See any of the these posts about me being knocked up. It was awful. Specifically the first 12 weeks, I was a shell of the person I am. I don't know if I ever told the story here - but there was one point where the ball & chain literally teared up - voicing his fears that I would "never be the same again."  To name just a few of the joys of incubation: I cried, uncontrollably, every single day - most days 2-3 times a day. I went to sleep early - like still light out early. I could not stomach any kind of vegetable or meat. This left pasta, pasta or chips. Oh or ice cream. That's it - it was literally all I could bare to eat, see or smell. OH or mash potatoes. You get the picture.  And whoa nelly with the mood swing nastiness. Let us not forget 12 hour a day nausea. The only time I wasn't nauseous was when I was sleeping. I was walking misery. I haven't felt miserable, I can eat all things, nothing is making me want to vomit, I am sleeping normal hours, I haven't been (unusually) moody - all signs point to not knocked up. 

The other big "give away" other than disposition was the clear and present visitor this past month.  You know. Aunt Flo. Yes, I did. So what? It didn't work the first time around. What's the big whoop? We'll keep at it and all will work out.

OK SO let's go back to 4 am - post flutter and WebMD doom and gloom of liver disease, cancer, common cold OR pregnancy,etc.

The next morning I went to the store, I needed printer ink, cough drops, and a pregnancy test. Why not? Just get the flutter out of my head. I didn't tell the husband, because he was going to think I was crazy. SO I waited for him to go to the gym and take the test. 

Spoiler alert, if you haven't figured it out yet (you may need to lay off the day time drinking) - the test came back with a BIG (well small, thin) surprise. 

Monday, January 24, 2011

Excused Absence

L: "Did you see that picture of Mommy? With the flowers?"
Daddy: "Yup, I was there.  That's our wedding day!"
L: "Yeah, I wasn't there. I stayed home that day."

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Princess Diaries

I don't dress up. I despise dressing up. If I could live in flip flops and jeans, I would. I try to make that reality as much as possible. I wore flip flops on our wedding day, I'm committed.

(those are in fact white reefs - my F.O.C.*)

Don't judge. As I told my mom who had a slight temper tantrum about these... Jesus wore sandals; I'm sure He doesn't mind me wearing the same at His house. I'd want people to be comfortable in my house. 

I know HOW to dress up (barely). I can throw on a suit for work, or a dress when needed. I often times need some help with shoe pairings (see addiction to flatware / flip flops). And I NEVER look cute like I could walk out of a magazine, but 8 times of 10, I'm at least 'passable.'
I understand those that say "dress for the part you want, not the part you have" or "Clothes make the man" (or woman, as the case may be).  I believe it. I respect it. I just don't believe that's the way it SHOULD be. That's just me and I'm happy in my minority.  I believe there is much discrepancy with these kinds of rules and while appearance can be important when you are a donkey behind your tailored look - I just don't get why you would be more respected than the helpless girl / guy behind the more natural / rugged look. That's just me. 

I wasn't going to go in the way of clothing tirade. I guess the point is - I hate dressing up. You know who doesn't? 

My alleged offspring. As if the blond hair, blue eyes, fair skin and super tall statue wasn't enough to set us apart - she loves to dress up.  Seriously loves it and gets upset if she can't. 

Example: Over the course of the last few weeks, we have been ENCOURAGING comfy days when we are home - be it holidays, snow days or weekends. We would let her stay in pajamas all day if we weren't planning on going out. She will NOT have this. Over the holidays, she pitched such a fit to change - so we laid out leggings and a long sleeve. She panicked!  She freaked out until we got out tights, fancy shoes and a ruffle dress with pearls on it.
She requests dresses every morning, the more sparkles, the better.  At this point, we've figured out how to work in long sleeve shirts under SHORT sleeve dresses, because they have sparkles and that makes her world go 'round. We do not have a picky eater. We do not have a non-sleeper. I guess instead we were given a fashion snob. Could be worse.

She also KNOWS what goes and what does not. She had "clashing wacky tacky day" or something like that at school.  Knowing how finicky she is with what she will wear, the ball & chain kept her busy while he got her changed. When he was done, here was the final product and her response. A true quote.

I have forever dealt with fashion issues... and I birth a true fashionista. I am totally screwed. If you are what you wear, my kid wants to be a Princess. Awesome.
*F.O.C. = Flop OF Choice or Flip Flop of Choice

Friday, January 7, 2011

Her Favorite Daddy

Seen & heard Sunday night... 

L: "Who's my favorite Daddy?" 
Ball&Chain: "I don't know? WHO?" 
L: "It's YOU, Ball&Chain*!"

*She didn't really say Ball&Chain, instead she used his first name, only.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

The Art of Lying

In 2011, I want to be better with my hoarding ways. We get SO much art sent home from school.  Some of it never makes the pile I keep... but some of them, I can't part with. The example posted above.They paint, draw, scribble a TON of things and the teachers often transcribe what it is.  Apparently this one (hopefully) has the theme of FICTION.

I haven't fallen. I haven't been to the park in ages. I will, however, be scanning pictures that come home from now on to save the memory and decrease the clutter.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Rudolph is a (Dirty) Chip off the Ol'Block

I'm a HUGE stats dork. Excel? It's my dirty little secret. That bastard can make me happy no matter what kind of mood I'm in.
In the same vein, I LOVE finding out stats, numbers, visitors, who stays, who goes, how you find this little space online. 

I started paying attention when I realized how many smokers out there are attacked to this space... bizzaro world. Now? Now Rudolph has brought you here, perhaps. Here's my question though - why is Rudolph considered dirty? A weenie, fine. Perhaps a loner. Dirty? I don't buy it.

snap shot of some search keywords

Rudolph's dad a jerk - check. I believe. I BELIEVE. But fault the little guy for being dirty? Can't we just leave that B alone?

Monday, January 3, 2011

Dreamy Christmas - Wrap Up

So where last we left our holiday heroes we were enjoying the look of Christmas magic

I have to be honest, homegirl made out.  Among other things, she got just what she needed like fantastic outfits from Nana Lu, just what she wanted like Rudolph the Red Nosed Dang Reindeer from her MyUncleChris and super fun snow globe light up Frosty’s from Uncle Ricky. Of which a few days deep she has almost drained the batteries.  Nana Lu told me about this video, the kid who got books and called NO FAIR on Christmas past.  Want to know just one of the reasons I love my kid? She got books too – and before she wanted to open the rest of her presents she wanted to stop and read them. How cool is she?  You get books for Christmas, in her mind. 

Last year, in pursuit for the best holiday card ever, 2009, I purchased some footie pajamas.  Adult sized. Unfortunately the ball & chain and I were not our most svelte so they didn’t fit at all right.  The good news is, this year they fit perfectly.  I picked up some complimenting pajamas for the rest of our house guests and the result? Christmas. Magic.

After present overload we sat around, sipped on some mimosas and freed some of the toys from their treacherous shackles and awaited the next wave of arrivals!  

Seriously: Elves, Santa, toy manufactures worldwide…. what is UP with the packaging? Are you preparing the toys for serious earthquake survival? I mean forget about the who environmental impact of all that plastic, twist ties reinforced with tape, wire and sticky glue – what about the cost for these materials? The aggravation alone – I would pay MORE to be able to buy toys that don’t require a toolbox and bone cutting scissors to free the toy.

Grammy & Pa Pa arrived and present giving and receiving take 2 took place with only 1 causality caused by poor labeling.  Continuing the legacy (from a few hours earlier), everyone got spoiled and L walked away with some serious booty. A favorite of mine? A nativity scene - made by Melissa & Doug. We have a Christmas tree, we even have a menorah... but a nativity set? We didn't. It's perfect!  Not to mention, Belle & matching movie - L was in heaven.

Fun fact? Grammy & Poppa and Uncle Ricky both bought us wines inspired by the love of my summer sipper. Looky looky. Blogging brings additional benefits! 

The day progressed with fun, relaxation, delish food (thanks to the talented ball & chain) and some more relaxing. It was a pretty perfect day. I was right, what can I say? Holidays at home ARE the way to go. Since it was our first year home, we eased into it all.  Next year we'll most likely pare down the Christmas Take 2, etc but the holidays at home are here to stay. 

The day after Christmas we were scheduled to go to the ball & chain's brother's house. While I know how much L loves her cousin time, I'm not going to lie. We got hit with a blizzard and I couldn't be happier.  Thus the beginning of this post (posted yesterday)... started during the storm, 1 week ago (at this point). We watched movies, played in the snow, drank hot chocolate with mash-a-mellows and enjoyed the aftermath. All house guests made a run for the boarder first thing in the morning to avoid the snow and while the time with the fam was nice - again, not going to lie - to have the house to ourselves was fantastic. 

On Tuesday (12/28) we had Christmas Part Two - with Poppa & Cami. More love, more celebrations, more eating, more PRESENTS. L got a Dora (thanks God now all her Christmas wishes came true).  Then on Wednesday, Christmas Part Three (see what I mean, lots of takes to this fine holiday). We headed to Nana Lu's to spend time with (great) aunts, Nona & (second) cousins. Basically it was rest, travel, rest, travel. Having as much family as we do is a lucky thing. Not all being down the street? Inconvenient.  This upcoming weekend we'll go to Albany - part birthday party, part Christmas Part Four, would have been Two if not for the blizzard. THEN finally, Christmas is over, until next time. Aren't you exhausted? Wait, is it just me? We're on delay over here at Chez Guarro - thus the Christmas post finally gracing the pages as of 1.2.2011 - what does this mean for the 2011 wrap up? Dang. Perhaps it will be worth the wait? Unlikely. I am pretty sure I still owe two or three months worth of pictures, a video of our tree trimming and a wrap up from our trip abroad? Maybe 2011 will be more orderly?!

Here's to hoping!

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Dreamy Christmas - Introduction(ish)

Oh happiness. Christmas miracles of Christmas miracles. Let me set the scene. This post started, to date of my completion and re-read the 26th of December. Keep that in mind, based on the publish date; whenever that might end up being.  As I go through, I realize this bad boy has to be in two parts (Hooray, two posts taken care of! CHECK!) That’s how busy we’ve been or been busy relaxing in-between the next ‘course’ of family visits.  OK, now back the 26th… this feels like virtual time travel.

We are gleefully sitting on our couch.  Snugged up, candles burning & kid napping.  Christmas amazing. I am typing from my wireless keyboard to my iPad. Oh yes.

Wireless. iPad  Maybe it’s just me, but those two words feel like porn might to those that well, like the porn.  You get the picture (though now I’m not sure what kind of picture you are getting).

I'm sipping an ice cold drink from A Christmas Story glass and we are snowed in.  Oh yes we are. This is truly the best Christmas eva. We've had a house full of love, celebration, relaxation and Christmas magic for days.  It wouldn't be a family gathering with out a little yelling (it's how we communicate) a touch of cussing and a few minutes of aggravation.  If it was missing any of these components we would have been at someone else’s house - likely other people all together. Despite the plan to stay home and not travel, we got (mostly) that.  Traditions began and our home was the meeting place for the holidays, for the first time ever. Though I think we hosted an Easter a bit back, when we were in Boston. This was very different.

Nana Lu & Uncle Ricky arrived Christmas Eve, quickly followed by MyUncleChris. The first tradition we introduced was having a relaxing and stress free dinner. I highly suggest it.  Basically, you don't make dinner at all. Who doesn't like appetizers? We noshed through the night, watched Christmas movies and set up for Santa. Milk & cookies (that L helped to make & decorate) for the big man and carrots for his ride. Magically wonderful.

Christmas morning the kid woke up at the reasonable time of 7am.  Not bad. She ran to the living room to see that Nana Lu wasn't there, as she expected. She was out walking the dog, to prepare for the reveal. I asked her, "Where do you think Nana Lu is?"
Quite seriously she responded, "Maybe she's with Santa or somethin?"

Santa delivered many a present to our good little girl. Some might say he went overboard, but I would maintain that he found some serious deals. The good news?  He also got the wrapping done early.  The bad news? Only a few presents turned up with out a label. What's the worst that could happen? They must all be for the kid of the house? Right?

L's first present she opened knowing Santa Claus had picked them just for her was.... (drum roll please):

A pair of oven mitts. Perhaps meant for her father... maybe, maybe not.
About three presents deep, she was done.  Not done as in, no more presents to open.  Done as in, she was all set with the whole thing.  I can't be sure, but after prodding and (honestly) bribery, she finally got through her goodies from Santa. Including endless coloring books, play dough and other random tchotchke Santa had been saving since he went to BlogHer.  A paint set, additions to her dollhouse, markers and crayons, oh my. Barbie & her horse and some alternative clothes to change her up in.  Side note: Barbie dresses pretty loose if you ask me. Since Santa figured Barbie might need a Ken, the right thing to do would be to make sure Barbie got the right kind of Ken... like an Edward instead. Oh yes I he did.

Picture compliments of MyUncleChris who promptly posted this pic and the following caption on Facebook: "Ken is not allowed in my sister's house so Belle gets Edward for a date this christmas."

With the opening of a bike helmet, we thought it would be clear that a bike was "somewhere" under the pile... like the largest present front and center of the fireplace, under a bike sized bag. Oh boy - she doesn't have the finding gene of her father.  Did you know he once found a contact in a swimming pool? True. Story.

Also a true story? It took her about a half hour to figure out that the giant bike sized bag contained a bike.  I didn’t get too many pictures from the morning, but I did get this one – this is the exact moment she screamed, “I FOUND MY BIKE-A-KLE!”

I leave you with the look of Christmas magic .. to be continued...
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